Reminiscing

Okay the day had been loooong and I told them they will miss me... I guess nobody believed me when I said I'm not coming back... Well let's wait until 2010...

I went to the high school reunion and became a wall flower for a while. I did hang out with the great KDLIG, my dear artist friend who's making waves with her graphic designs! Anyway, Rox was there and so had been my other high school batch mates.

It was a fun night I just went home early because I am so sleepy and I can't stand the smoke anymore...

30 December 2009

Au Revoir

This might be my last day at work.


29 December 2009

DT!!!

I finally got a new desk top! Gracias Mama!

28 December 2009

Another One Bites The Dust

I just can't believe it...I am still shocked and God knows what else. The whole family went to Papa's party with his old buddies and it had been fun but the news I received when I got home just blew me away.

Redj sent a message that Lef is dead. I thought it was meant as a metaphor or what but a "deja vu" moment that I had experienced minutes before her text message arrived made me believe that it was not a sick joke.

I went online right away and chatted with her. I was in shock and I was really confused. While we were chatting I told her that I had a bad dream on C's birthday that I was in a hospital and saw those bright lights people normally find in emergency or operating rooms. I guess she can't believe it herself or the irony of the dream...Lef crashed in a hospital...

So sad that a friend died almost a month ago and we just found out about it. Aside From Redj, C, and C, Lef had been one of my first friends on the internet. He lived on the other side of the world but he was like a friend or part of the family that we knew quite well.

What now of his dreams to become president of his country? I do remember the conversations we had of how similar our societies are and that even though a lot of politicians that run our countries are corrupt, people remain cheerful and hopeful that there will be a brighter tomorrow. What will become of that hope now that one of the people who had a vision for a better future is now gone? What will become of his hopes to see the love of his life? There will be no Love In The Time Of Cholera for him and her. Not in this lifetime. So sad...

I can't say that I knew him very well as much as the others did but to him he was like a lost brother or relative. There had been some stuff that we agreed on that the others haven't heard of or never knew. So there's a reason why there were no more gifts from him on Mafia Wars... He already passed away...

I am just wondering what happened after the crash. What took place, what had been his injuries... Was my dream connected to what happened to him? I don't know.

This gift of "dreaming of the future" thing has become a curse... I can't control it. I had a dream last April about a car crash but in the dream another person was involved so I told that person about the dream in order to jinx it. So sad somebody really died from a car crash...somebody I least expected to die on such a sad state...

Three different people who never knew each other told me of my future, of my death. All three said I will die from a car crash... No one just knows when...

I can change my fate... Too bad I can't change the fate of other people...

Rest in peace Leeef... You will be missed.

27 December 2009

Woooo

Exhausted from another family get-together... It's the only time of the year when almost every member of the clan is present since it's my grandmother's death anniversary. It's kinda weird that we celebrate on the day of our grandmother's death but hey, it's a fun time!

My grandmother died 20 years ago, 26 December at around 3 am. We were pulled out from the neighbors' Christmas party for kids and we spent time at the hospital talking with her even though she ouldn't recognize us anymore. She was so sick and toxic!

My cousins and I were taken home around midnight and we only managed to sleep after exhausting ourselves with Millionaires' Game. When I woke up in the morning I saw my cousin sitting still, starign into space... I knew then Nanay wasn't with us anymore. I was just 7...

Wherever she is right now, whose body she possesses or on what plane her soul might be resting, I wish her well. We'll see each other again... I gotta sleep... Tomorrow's big day for pops...

Working on a Holiday

It's Christmas and I am here working and blogging for all I care!


25 December 2009

I woke up early and went to mass as usual...I have completed another set of Misa de Gallo! Clap clap! When we got home from the mass I cooked macaroni soup and I guess I made too much that's why I gave off some to some of my work mates.

I worked once again on the eBook and I think I will be way off from the deadline... The client's gonna kill meeeeee!!!

Anyway, it's almost Christmas... I don't like Christmas as much as I used to when I was a kid but then let me just greet you Happy Holidays!

24 December 2009

Negative?

I am so pissed I haven't had enough sleep. I guess i had too much of my mix! It was already around 2am that I got home from the party with my grade school classmates at JJ's house. I slept for an hour or so and went to mass. I shouldn't miss a Misa de Gallo unless I live in a different country!

Anyway, you have to congratulate me because my 13th month pay is equal to almost negative 800! Yes! Where in the world have you heard of a negative 13th month pay? Only in CDO... Hahaha! My pay slip had a blank entry on the 13th month pay line... Tsk tsk... I'll just sleep it off I guess... Tomorrow is another day...

23 December 2009

Okay, I was supposed to be in a party right now but I went home and played the Grinch. I am so pissed off with my grandfather's maid who stole money (and God knows what) from him! I hope she'll drop dead right now! Hahaha I'm so brutal! Let's just let Karma take its course.

My workmates are partying the night away and I'm not there. Our boss doesn't know about the party (YET) but he'll know about it soon. This is so ridiculous...I think we're not going to have a company Christmas party after all!

19 December 09

Wahahaha!

I was absent from work because I have been doing something else. Hahahha! Melissa and I went to the bank and applied for the friggin' card and we didn't know that we had to bring photocopies of our IDs... Hmmm...very helpful people! Tsk tsk...

So we eventually found a photocopying machine by the hospital where my unlce died (or was brought on emergency and declared dead on arrival). I never liked that street or that hospital since it brings back sad memories.

Anyway, after the bank stint, I went back to the internet shop and TRIED to work on the friggin' eBook and I did't gt much done since I don't like the topic! Liz went to get her hair done in a salon while I met up with my cousin. Oh boy her new ride is so cool! I picked up the stuff Liz ordered from her online store and she treated me to another free dinner! Hahahaha! I'm such a freeloader! I suck!

While waiting for Liz, I received a message from some people I haven't heard from in ages. Tsk tsk.. Yeah I am still alive. It's good to know you're alive too!

Yey!

Changed the template finally! I guess I really have to date each post since this template posts only the time.. Tsk tsk.. I love it!

Universe, here I am!


16 December 09

Wake Up At Dawn...

It's time to sleep early...I need to wake up early for the start of the dawn masses... I am not as religious as other people but since 2003, I have never missed a single Misa de Gallo...

Devoted? Hmmm... I dunno... I am not Catholic... I am more than just a Catholic... my religion is beyond definition. My beliefs are not ordinary.

I believe in the immortality of the soul and I believe that the Universe plays a big part in my beliefs.

We're all GOD...

Sleeping Ugly

I overslept and I missed a party! My college friends and I were supposed to drink the night away like we did back then but I had been too grouchy I didn't show up.

Blame it on my new meds! I am always sleepy!

I wonder who went to the party... I got a feeling someone I don't want to deal with went there... I can feel it through my veins...

Across The Universe

The Beatles... I LOVE this song...


Words are flying out like endless rain into a paper cup
They slither while they pass
They slip away across the universe
Pools of sorrow waves of joy are drifting thorough my open mind
Possessing and caressing me

Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world

Images of broken light which dance before me like a million eyes
That call me on and on across the universe
Thoughts meander like a restless wind inside a letter box
They tumble blindly as they make their way across the universe

Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world

Sounds of laughter shades of life are ringing through my open ears exciting and inviting me
Limitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns
It calls me on and on across the universe

Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Jai guru deva
Jai guru deva

AUM!

Ta-da! I have finally sent the sales letter around 4am and of course, I got to work late! Not surprising hahaha!

Well the exhibit opening was a success (I guess) with the madame UN Ambassador amazingly singing Amazing Graze and the native kid playing beautifully on his bamboo flute. A tribute/recognition to our mentor of all time, Sir Nonoy, was short but sweet and he was given a token, an artwork by one of his wards, up and coming artist Louie Talents. Tsk tsk...I know he'd kill me if I typed down his real name!

Should I say that I am proud of my painting? It caught the attention of people I least expected to appreciate it. That girl who used to react negatively on my paintings in the past looked for me because she loved AUM (yes, I named the painting AUM!) and she even shook my hand vigorously because she was enthralled with it.

The opening was a success. I was on cloud 9 for a while. I even got treated to a free dinner (no, not again) by my cousin. I have already dozed off yet I have been "alarmed" to reality with the text messages from my work mates.

Well, well, well... Seems I have been right with my hunches before... We're on spy cam! Tsk tsk... Somebody's paranoia is rising too high it's gonna eat him alive someday...

This Is It!

I am still working on the sales letter huhu! I guess this is going to be another all-nighter eh?

I already brought the painting to the mall and didn't help them set up the exhibit. They all know I am friggin' busy! I'll be there tomorrow though. I'll make up a lame excuse hahaha!

Kolai's advance birthday party was fun! I love Elvis!

It Is Finished!

It is finished! My painting is a funny mix of colors. Daubs of paint any kid could do that's what it is! I dunno if this could pass off as a decent painting hahahaha!

Universe, embrace me... I still have to search for a title though... A title that is unique...


Now off to the sales letter...

Gotta work hard for the money dearie...

Blank Canvas

The canvas is already propped up on the easel and all my paints and brushes are waiting for me outside. I got no other time to paint but tonight! I am so damned tired yet I don't have a choice if I still want to be part of the exhibit. I still have no idea what to paint! Shall I let my subconscious take over and do automatic painting? Hahahaha!

Here we go again! I gotta wrap myself up..it's so cold tonight! I gotta get the painting done by tomorrow because I still have a friggin' sales letter to submit on the 7th.

Finally!

Finally I have finished the eBook! I hope the client likes it. I only have to worry about my painting for the upcoming exhibit. I have no idea what to paint! I don't have enough time to paint! They will kill me if I will back out from the exhibit! Uggghhhhh!

My Muse, where art thou?

Tarot de Marseilles

Happy 3rd birthday to you my dear Tarot de Marsailles! I wish that we will have better years ahead!

It's just funny though that during this time of celebration I woke up at dawn because I had a scary dream... Knock on wood... If it's my fate, I just hope it wouldn't happen soon.

Dreams are scarier than Tarot cards...

Excited!

The client paid me in advance! Wow! I hope I'll do great with the task! I'll be rewriting an eBook! Wish me luck Universe!

Instant Karma?

I guess the chanting worked! I sent a message to the Universe that I wish I could catch a good client for a part time writing job. I received a lot of offers today but I think there's this one that's a good potential client! I hope this works well! I'm looking forward to earning extra moolah!

Wow!

The very first intensive meditation was OVERWHELMING! I have never felt such strong vibrations from chanting mantras until I have experienced them firsthand. What an amazing night! Too bad we're not allowed to disclose information to people who aren't part of the Order.

The Eye of Ra

I have never expected that I will be able to encounter something like this in my life right here in my hometown! The other day I was riding a jeepney and a photocopied "poster" caught my eye. A very noticeable image of the Eye of Ra was on it! I saw in bold letters the words FREE SEMINAR and since the rest were in smaller print, I swore I'll go see the poster up close the next day so I can see the details.

The next day came and I went down from my ride and took a photo of the poster. I copied the contact number and left with a big smile on my face. I can smell freshly cut grass though I was stuck in polluted traffic. I have never expected something like it to happen here in this laid-back city.

I told a couple of friends about it and too bad one is so far away she can't join me in the seminar. The other one's a work mate so I expected that she can go with me. Well, as expected, I arrived at the seminar this afternoon LATE. I was late for at least 15 minutes but it felt like the seminar started an hour earlier.

The speaker is a respected person in his field and he is a mystic. He seems to know all answers to the questions of the audience and I am just blown away... I have never felt so overwhelmed! I wanted to ask a question but my hands were so cold and clammy and I kept putting off my question until after the rest have presented their queries. Too bad, I never acted fast, I never got to ask the Master. Maybe next time...

B and I were happy with the seminar even though she went out and did some stuff and came back later on. We decided to join the Order and see if we can benefit from it. I am just awashed with bright light I am so optimistic!

The Universe is so big and I am just a speck of dust. I embrace the Universe as it embraces me too... I hope this step to Enlightenment will bring more hope for me and the future. :D