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Detail of Saint Sophia The Almighty Wisdom (1932)
Tempera on Canvas
by Nicholas Roerich |
IT has been a while since she last set foot on the Master’s abode and she became ecstatic because she was finally allowed to enter the inner chamber and talk with Him. For many months, she thought that her journey on the Path has finally ended and she would not be allowed to go a step further. Nevertheless, reflecting and learning from her transgressions made her realize that everything that has transpired is a fragment of the Cosmic Plan and it is up to her to give up or keep going.
With her heart beating in quadruple time, she finally reached the chamber portal and was left by her escort at the threshold. When she entered the door, she was surprised because the room seemed empty, she thought maybe she had to wait a while before she would be given the privilege of an audience. She walked around then found Him sitting by the fireplace, feeding logs to the golden flames.
She hurriedly approached Him and knelt to kiss His feet, doing the exact same gesture she did the last time they seriously talked. As per usual, He commanded her to stand up and ignore the honorifics. She was so elated with the rare occasion and thus hurriedly exclaimed, “Oh Master, there You are! I am so happy to see You again! I have missed you for so long. I know that You have chosen not to see me for months because I have been lacking in tact when I talked about the things that You have said to me to those who were not ready to learn from them. I was wrong, I myself had not been ready to learn from what You have said. Now I can talk to You again and I am eager to learn more. I promise to be more careful this time. I am honored for this exceptional moment. Thank You!”
“Ahh My child, I have been here all along, you just didn’t see Me because you have been too preoccupied in trying to disprove what I have told you a year ago. Can you still clearly remember what I have told you?” He asked her while giving her the same sly smile He gave her the previous year as he motioned her to sit with Him by the fire.
She earnestly replied, “Yes, Teacher. I can still remember what You told me and it haunted me for many months! You are right, I had been trying too hard to disprove what You said and You are fully aware why I have been trying to fight it. I was just not prepared to face the challenges that came along my path. Everything flew by like a whirlwind and I didn’t know what to do. I have been trying to squeeze my brain dry for answers and all along, I missed the point of the whole reason WHY You told me what You said then.”
“And what was the point?” He asked her.
She was quite adamant but possibly, due to the circumstances that took place for the past year and maybe due to the effect of the mantra she had been seriously chanting for more than forty days, she resorted to yield and said, “The heart is where You dwell, and if I really want to become Your student that is where I will always find You. However, I have misinterpreted what You said. I believed then that what You said was quite vague and I took it seriously on its face value. I asked a sincere question and You gave me a sincere answer but I was just so blinded with many things I have overlooked what You really meant. I am sorry it took me too long to realize that.”
He smiled and patted her right shoulder. He said, “You did nothing wrong. How you interpreted what I said was how it was supposed to be understood by you a year ago. How you went about with the choices you have made based on that interpretation was not wrong too because things were meant to happen as they were so you would finally reach this point where you are now at, so you would realize the true meaning of My answer. The thing with you My child, is that you had been too hard on yourself. You didn’t enjoy how the things in your inner and outer life unfolded because you were too concerned of what’s going to happen outside of you instead of what was to happen inside of you. You tried to stop things from happening smoothly in your outer world that’s why your inner world experienced what you have experienced. Am I right?”
She knew that what He said was true and because of that she bowed her head. She then said, “Yes, You are right Master. I had been too concerned of what’s outside of me instead of what’s inside of me that’s why my life is in shambles. I kept asking for help from You and from the Others but I felt my pleas were never heard maybe because I was so preoccupied, trying to rationalize every single thing and not going with the natural flow of the Cosmos that’s why I didn’t realize then that You were with me all along…and You always will be!” She then timidly said, “I still have a question though, are You willing to take me now?”
“Are you sure you want to be with Me now and become My serious disciple?” He retorted, albeit lovingly.
With a deep sigh she replied, “In the physical world, You asked me a couple of months ago if I wanted to go with You and be among Your chosen Warriors but I said I was not sure. But I know that You knew then that in my heart I would go with You if you told me to. You did not force me to. I could have turned my back on everything and went with You. However, I have realized that You did not use force or coercion because You honor what we ordinary folk deem as free will and I believed that You still want me to learn what I need to learn in my world. During these past months, I have realized that I will be following You for eternity, but not in the usual conventional ways. You know what I really want, right? I will still keep the promise I gave You not too long ago. Lately my life became more challenging and I still believe I could give You what You want of me and my soul even though I am not physically near You. Twice I have failed to see You again in the flesh but both times, You sent Your messages to me through my friends so I could finally see You again right here, right now. I am grateful for everything. Thank You for putting wonderful souls on my path. I owe them a lot for helping me get closer to Your Light once more.”
He placed another log into the fireplace and it was immediately licked by the flames. He spoke sincerely, “My dear child, when your friends came to see Me, I knew that a part of you was with them that is why I spoke of things I knew you will learn through them. There were some things of course which are solely for them to learn from. However, those that are also meant for you, you are now aware of. Use them wisely so that one day you could help others become aware of those gems of Wisdom too.“
She stared at the fire and tried to applied that experiment which gave one the power to change the color of the flames. She stared too long at one blazing tongue and whether her eyes were playing tricks on her or not, it turned into a deep violet. Silently she whispered, “I want to become a writer and write of the Path and all the glorious and sometimes unglamorous things that lead to It. I want to write from the perspective of a student who learns a thing or two from every opportunity and obstacle or challenge that sprouts up on the Path. These past few years of technical writing have stripped off the spark from my creativity and I want to revive that spark! Could You help me with that? I want to paint too! I know I could do better than what I have done before and I want to dip my brush into the Soul of the Universe so I could help others remember where we all came from. I also miss poetry. You are a poet; I hope You could give me some pointers.”
The fire crackled and it snapped her out from her deep concentration and all the flames were golden once more. She looked at Him whom she hadn’t noticed had already stood up and stretched His arms and legs. She stood up too and expected that her visit already came to an end.
“You already know what to do. Just always remember that I AM always with you. You may not see Me often but You know where I dwell. My face is just a face of an ordinary man, but You could still see Me in the faces and hearts of other men and women. You are already aware of this; you just have to remember and keep believing in it. Keep practicing what you need to practice and in due time you and the rest will know all of Me. Visit me again soon my child. If you will not come, I will visit you!” His serious tone then turned into a roar of laughter which somehow confused her.
He led her to the door and made the salutation He taught her in a previous encounter and she was assured that His laughter was to lighten up her spirits, to relieve her from her drama. She gave Him the same salutation. As the door opened, she turned and was about to ask him one more question for the road. However, when she turned and looked back, He was no longer in sight.
Then she woke up.
She inhaled the cool air of the morning and parted the window curtains in order to see and say hello to the Sun. She looked at her bedside table and picked up the blazing red and orange book, one of the many books she borrowed from her friends. She randomly opens a page or two every day and reflects on the first verse that catches her eye.
She remembered that she didn’t have the chance to ask Him her last question before she woke up. Yet He gave her the answer she needed:
150. If I say that I am always with you, will many believe it? They would even fear to believe in the united consciousness. For them, each such union is an intrusion upon their selfhood, and as such is entirely intolerable. They will never appreciate the tenfold multiplication of energy born of the cooperation of consciousnesses. But without such cooperation the entire Teaching of the Heart would be impossible. Why all details if there cannot be mutual fortification? But if this principle is attainable, then its enlargement to the full union of consciousnesses, which is called "Paloria," is also possible. But, then, how greatly can the work of those who acknowledge and have attained the unification of consciousnesses be extended for the General Good! Of course, I speak of the inner spiritual work, which the blind can neither perceive nor appreciate.
The summons to a unity of consciousnesses is necessary everywhere, because this is the simplest introduction into the life of the heart. This is not sorcery but a physical law that can weave a salutary net around the planet. Thus, everyone who follows the law of Being can justly consider himself a citizen of the Universe.
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